36 Questions to Bring You Closer Together
36個問題，讓你們更緊密地聯(lián)系在一起

Get to know someone and create a sense of intimacy, in as little as an hour.
在短短一個小時內了解某人并創(chuàng)造一種親密感。

Posted October 15, 2013 |  Reviewed by Lybi Ma

·        Social psychology researcher Arthur Aron shared a list of questions that generate closeness between two people.
社會心理學研究員亞瑟·阿倫（Arthur Aron）分享了一系列在兩個人之間產生親密關系的問題。

·        Aron's results were published in "The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness" in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin (1997).
Aron的研究結果發(fā)表在《人格與社會心理學公報》（1997）的“人際親密關系的實驗一代”中。

·        Questions that bring people together cover various topics including friendship, death, sharing, and family.
將人們聚集在一起的問題涵蓋了各種主題，包括友誼、死亡、分享和家庭。

These questions only take about 45 minutes to discuss—and they almost always make two people feel better about each other and want to see each other again, according to social psychology researcher Arthur Aron of the Interpersonal Relationships Lab at Stony Brook University in New York, who published his results in "The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness" in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin (1997).
這些問題只需要大約45分鐘就可以討論，而且它們幾乎總是讓兩個人對彼此感覺更好，并希望再次見面，紐約石溪大學人際關系實驗室的社會心理學研究員亞瑟·阿倫（Arthur Aron）在《人格與社會心理學公報》（Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin，1997）上發(fā)表了他的研究結果。

You can try these questions with a date, but they're not necessarily only applicable to fostering romance. You can also try them with people you already know well—friends, family members, even long-term partners—to deepen your ties.
你可以在約會時嘗試這些問題，但它們不一定只適用于培養(yǎng)浪漫。你也可以和你已經熟悉的人——朋友、家人，甚至是長期伴侶——一起嘗試，以加深你們的聯(lián)系。

Each of you should take a turn answering each question. Here they are, in order:
你們每個人都應該輪流回答每個問題。它們在這里，按順序排列：

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, who would you want as a dinner guest?
1. 如果世界上任何人可以選擇，你會想讓誰作為晚餐客人？

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
2. 你想出名嗎？以什么方式？

3. Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Why?
3. 在打電話之前，你有沒有排練過你要說的話？為什么？

4. What would constitute a perfect day for you?
4. 對你來說，什么才是完美的一天？

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
5.你上一次給自己唱歌是什么時候？給別人？

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose?
6. 如果你能活到90歲，并在生命的最后60年保持30歲的身心，你會選擇哪一個？

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
7.你對自己將如何死亡有秘密的預感嗎？

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
8. 說出你和你的伴侶似乎有共同點的三件事。

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
9.在你的生活中，你最感激什么？

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
10.如果你能改變你的成長方式，那會是什么？

11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
11. 花四分鐘時間，盡可能詳細地告訴你的伴侶你的人生故事。

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained one quality or ability, what would it be?
12.如果你明天醒來時獲得了一種品質或能力，那會是什么？

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
13.如果水晶球可以告訴你關于你自己、你的生活、未來或其他任何事情的真相，你想知道什么？

14. Is there something that you've dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven't you done it?
14.有沒有你夢寐以求的事情很久了？你為什么不做？

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
15.你一生中最大的成就是什么？

16. What do you value most in a friendship?
16.在友誼中，你最看重什么？

17. What is your most treasured memory?
17.你最珍貴的記憶是什么？

18. What is your most terrible memory?
18.你最可怕的記憶是什么？

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
19.如果你知道一年后你會突然死去，你會改變你現(xiàn)在的生活方式嗎？為什么？

20. What does friendship mean to you?
20.友誼對你意味著什么？

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
21.愛和親情在你的生活中扮演什么角色？

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
22. 交替分享一些你認為是伴侶積極特征的東西?？偣卜窒?5 個項目。

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people's?
23.你的家人有多親密和溫暖？你覺得你的童年比大多數(shù)人更快樂嗎？

24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?
24.你如何看待你和母親的關系？

25. Make three true "we" statements each. For instance, "we are both in this room feeling..."
25. 每人做三個真實的“我們”陳述。例如，“我們倆都在這個房間里，感覺......”

26. Complete this sentence "I wish I had someone with whom I could share..."
26.完成這句話“我希望我有一個可以分享的人......”

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
27. 如果你要和你的伴侶成為親密的朋友，請分享對他或她來說很重要的事情。

28. Tell your partner what you like about them. Be honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you've just met.
28. 告訴你的伴侶你喜歡他們的什么。這次要誠實，說一些你可能不會對你剛認識的人說的話。

29. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
29.與你的伴侶分享你生活中的一個尷尬時刻。

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
30.你最后一次在別人面前哭泣是什么時候？靠自己？

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
31. 告訴你的伴侶你已經喜歡他們的事情了。

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
32.如果有的話，什么太嚴重了，不能開玩笑？

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven't you told them yet?
33.如果你今晚死了，沒有機會與任何人交流，你最后悔沒有告訴別人什么？你怎么還不告訴他們？

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
34.你的房子，包含你擁有的一切，著火了。在拯救了您的親人和寵物之后，您有時間安全地進行最后的沖刺以保存任何一件物品。那會是什么？為什么？

35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
35.在你家里的所有人中，你覺得誰的死最令人不安？為什么？

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner's advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.
36. 分享一個個人問題，并就他或她如何處理它征求你的伴侶的建議。另外，請你的伴侶向你反映你對你所選擇的問題的感受。